What do you call it when you keep like a running weblog entry as something is going on? I think there’s a word for it, but I don’t remember. Anyway, I coined the term “echo-blog” when I was talking to Lloyd the other day. I want to expand that term and implications in future entries.

What wacky predictions do I have? I don’t know, haven’t watched the show yet. Let me, however, give you my proto-hypothesis, my uneducated guess, that I told Jason before this season of Apprentice started: The “street smarts” team would win at first, but in the end, Trump would pick someone originally from the “book smarts” team.

An uneducated guess, though. So, I don’t put any stock in it, really. I’ve decided to put it out there, though, just to see what will happen.

8:40 – My sister upon seeing Bren during the intro sequence: “Ew, he looks like Smeagol.”

8:51 – Danny wore a suit. Smart. My level of respect for this guy just went up.

9:13 – I was thinking about it, and wow, it is all about the customer service. If people think you’re nice, they will give you a higher rating than you deserve. You know you’ve done it. Good call, again, Danny. Another notch up. The PM of Net Worth will probably get fired. No control. Once you start to lose control, you got to change directions. Nip the problem in the bud. He could’ve gotten past the budget issues, I bet. But not controlling your team. I didn’t think he was a bad leader until after everyone ditched him, and he did nothing.

9:24 – Okay… weird Verna walks out. Hello, all the people from first season got good job offers, even though they didn’t win. But you…? Nobody wants a quitter.

10:00 – Verna comes back, but whatever. We all know you’re not going to win. As for who might win? John is actually my early pick. His remarks about Brian were right on the money. John’s intelligent, and already proved he was a good leader.

Moral of today’s show: Never quit. Maybe you can learn something from TV.

Why The Apprentice is a brilliant show: It’s one big advertisement. First off, it’s great advertising for Donald Trump. You’ve also got product placement: The Donald lauds the hell out of those companies. Then, you got the more subliminal advertising, like going to Target. I was not surprised at all to see an actual Target commercial later on.

I’m watching The Apprentice right now, and I have a comment:

HELLO! Danny, this is the year 2005! Forget your retro-lingo.

He really bugs me. I hope he gets fired.

EDIT: 9:14 PM

I’ll tell you what’s “unbelievable”… how unbelievably annoying and corny that is!

9:24 PM

Carolyn: “This is sad.”

I agree. A cardboard box hole is your promotional material? C’mon. But really, I’m happy. This means Danny is prime material to be fired, and it will make the show that much less painful to watch.

9:33 PM

Trump’s purple tie was better than the one he was wearing in the boardroom. And, I have to admit, I did not like his pink ties last season.

9:47 PM

Ooh, power tie — red. Note to self.

On The Apprentice, you’re more likely to get fired if you bring in the wrong people. As much as I’d like to see Danny fired, there is a good possibility that what’s-his-name will get fired for bringing in Todd. He probably should’ve brought in the other marketing lady.

9:59 PM

Oops, sorry, I meant Todd would get fired for bringing in Alex. Whatever. In any case, I was completely right. And things were going to go exactly as I had predicted until we learned that new piece of evidence and Trump changed his mind.

Danny is just plain uncool. That’s all I have to say.

I was also thinking about the whole “high school” vs. “college” distinction. You know what? Most of the “street smarts” team did go to college! (At least, that’s the impression I received.) They just didn’t graduate. I also remember reading or hearing somewhere that most of the richest people had some college, not a degree. Moral of the story: go to college, but you don’t have to graduate.

[EDIT: I hope you know I’m joking. Really, it’s not street smarts versus book smarts… whoever has the best of both will win. Street savvy and a degree… that’s my plan. I’m not seriously going to use a TV show as the actual basis for my life plan or create my basic business philosophies. That would be ridiculous. It’s assisted reality. Still, it’s fun to watch.]

A list of movies I’ve seen since I’ve left for Las Vegas (and subsequently arrived):

• The Day After Tomorrow – bad movie, fun to make fun of… the beginning totally reminded me of Ice Age
• White Chicks – I thought it’d be retarded, but it was hilarious (yeah, it’s still retarded)
• Shogun Assassin – holy shit this movie is awesome, one of my new favorites

See y’all on the 28th or 29th. More intermittent entries to come whilst on vacation.

Yes! Kelly won! I was so afraid that Jennifer would win until nearly everyone interviewed said that Kelly was the better candidate. Trump made the right choice. Jennifer seemed to skate by, flying under the radar. It may have been good strategy to get to the finals, but not to win, since Kelly’s record was better.

I really started to like Raj, but then he was fired. When he asked for Robin’s number, that was classic, and my respect for him went sky high. After Raj was fired, my pick was either Andy or Kelly. But I didn’t really like either of them. Andy lost the cell phone, and that was a horrible mistake. Kelly was a good leader, but seemed a bit too dictatorial, and he lacked something.

That something was what more of the first season had. I really really liked Troy, and felt he should’ve been the Apprentice. I even liked Bill way better. The first season just had more passion, but not the bitchy kind of passion the second season candidates had. They were overall more likeable.

And now I’m worried about season three. The first season had some hotties. The second season was mediocre. The third season preview had some weird looking people in it. It’s not just hotness, but I wonder how likeable, and exciting, these people will be. I’m not impressed yet.

The Jeopardy guy, Ken Jennings, lost! I tune in to Jeopardy after not watching it for a really long time, and I see him lose. I can’t believe it!

That guy is uber-crazy. 2.5 million dollars. From Jeopardy. Damn, I don’t think anyone will ever win as long as he did.

What makes TV so much better than real life is reruns.

schizo killer: better that you learn your life lessons

schizo killer: from The Apprentice

schizo killer: than Pokemon

BuRniNgCiGar: LOL

BuRniNgCiGar: hey that line is classic

BuRniNgCiGar: “i want to be the very best”

BuRniNgCiGar: and u live by it too

BuRniNgCiGar: so STFU

On yesterday’s The Apprentice, Raj was fired. I didn’t necessarily want him to win, but I wanted him to stick around longer. So, I wore a bowtie today, haha.

Ooh, wow, in 2009 he’ll be host of The Tonight Show. That’s good news. Conan is hilarious.

Remember the Super Bowl halftime incident? CBS is getting fined a record $550,000 for it.

Wait a second, one boob costs $550,000? While Mr. Rather produces lies and he probably won’t even get fired?

Lists are fun ways to fill up space.

After watching Kill Bill vol. 2 for the second time, I’ve decided that Kill Bill is now my favorite movie. So, here’s my definitive Top 10 List, in order:

1. Kill Bill
2. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
3. Star Wars
4. Citizen Kane
5. The Lord of the Rings
6. There’s Something About Mary
7. Beauty and the Beast
8. Spiderman
9. The Lion King
10. Big Fish

Actually, this isn’t the definitive list. It gets murky after number 4. I also have to tell you that my movie repertoire is very limited, and I have a bad memory. In fact, I had a tough time thinking up ten. These were just the first 10 movies I thought up that I thought were pretty good. Oh yeah, and in case you couldn’t figure this out: I lumped together the sequels.

Here is a more definitive list. This time it’s of movies I love… not just like… love.

1. Kill Bill
2. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
3. Star Wars

Yup, that’s it.

I limited myself to 10 for the favorite movies list. I’m going to see if I can list all the movies I like tomorrow. I’ll also see if I have a different top 10 list.

I saw Kill Bill vol 1 on DVD, and then Kill Bill vol 2 at the theater. Very good idea. Both movies are brilliant.

I’d say I don’t understand what’s the big fuss was over William Hung, but I’ve given it some thought, and I do understand. However, that doesn’t mean I approve.

There were several other people who sang badly, why weren’t they offered deals? One factor: He isn’t a bitch. We Americans don’t typically like to reward bitchiness, so many of those people who said, “You’ll be sorry you didn’t pick me,” aren’t going to get a deal. Another example: Is there anyone who wanted Omarosa to win “The Apprentice”?

The second factor I believe is even more important: Not only does he sing funny, but he looks funny. It’s true. And, he talks funny.

That about sums it up. It’s a boost for self-esteem. You can say, “Okay, maybe I sing almost as bad, but at least I don’t look, talk, and act that funny.”

Face it, we’re laughing at him. Wait, what about his positive attitude? Yeah, that “positive attitude” is just a rationalization for laughing at him. I’m not cruel; I’m praising his “positive attitude” and how he’s trying to achieve the “American Dream.”

The real American Dream is just to find people worse off than you so you can laugh at them.

However, if you’ll pardon my mixed metaphor, I guess it’s William Hung who gets the last laugh… all the way to the bank.

Yet, that’s still just another rationalization: He’s getting money, or compensation for it, so it’s okay to laugh at him.

I’d criticize this, but I know America can go lower… much lower.

Can someone tell me why I always see the same episodes of an old show on TV? It seems like every time I try to watch Friends, I see that one Thanksgiving episode. And it’s not only that show.

American Idol is fascinating. What, me, watch American Idol? Yeah. I think you can all guess that I can identify with Simon.

Anyway, it’s funny to watch the people who suck. The fascinating thing is: How can these people believe that they are good singers? This is where agnoiology comes in. Are these people unpleasantly ignorant, or just plain stupid? How can they not hear themselves?

Maybe it should be mandatory for everyone to listen to themselves sing on a tape recorder. Can these bad people watch the episodes they’re on and still think they’re good? I just don’t understand it. Anyone else have any clue?

Oh, and I felt two earthquakes tonight. Around 10:30ish. Second one was bigger than the first. The first was just a jolt. Maybe there’ll be a third one, and school will be shut down. Yeah, I doubt it. But one can dream, can’t he?

Yeah, I’ve been kind of having trouble thinking of topics lately, so I’ll try out the list idea Lloyd mentioned. So, a list of TV shows that I currently like (not all of them currently airing). Note: They are not in any particular order.

• Monty Python’s Flying Circus (my favorite)
• Mystery Science Theater 3000 (what a great concept)
• Whose Line is it Anyway?
• The Drew Carey Show
• All in the Family (great interaction between characters)
• Three’s Company (yeah, I like it, but it’s a show best watched in moderation)
• Cheers (geeze, I have a penchant for some old sitcoms, but I like this one because of the great personalities of the variety of characters)
• FLCL (my favorite anime)
• Cowboy Bebop (just about tied with FLCL, I have trouble deciding which is my favorite)
• Trigun
• Blue Gender (on the low end of my favorites list, but still good)
• Lupin III
• InuYasha
• South Park (still good, even the later episodes)
• Family Guy (funniest show after Monty Python)
• Futurama
• The Simpsons (I like it, but I’ve never actually watched it all too much)
• Bewitched (Hm, who is the better Darren?)
• Gilligan’s Island (the classic, and the basis of many comedic formulas)
• I Love Lucy (another classic, but doesn’t rank very very high on my list)
• Home Movies (a nice original cartoon, pretty good)
• Space Ghost: Coast to Coast (off-the-wall humor, great)
• Reno 911! (new show on Comedy Central)
• Mail Call (on the History Channel, that guy has a great job)
• Unsolved History (this one’s actually on the Discover Channel)
• Family Feud (the old ones)
• Jeopardy
• Wheel of Fortune (ever noticed that the biggest dork on the show always wins it?)
• Iron Chef (oh yeah)

I think that’s about it. There may have been more that I forgot to put. I didn’t realize I liked that many shows, although many of them I haven’t watched in a while. So, let’s see what this says about me. There’s a lot of comedy shows there. People say that TV is bad because you don’t have to think. That’s exactly my purpose when I watch. It’s an escape. Naturally, comedy is a great escape. I’ve got a few game shows and one cooking show. Then again, the cooking show is a bit funny because of the format they use. Still, game shows are fun escapes.

I’ve got an interest in history and science, but usually, I just watch any show that’s on; I don’t watch regularly. So, every once in a while, I’ll actually learn something while watching television.

Finally, you can see my semi-recent obsession with anime. I don’t know when I started watching anime, exactly, but I’ve come to love it. The dubbing for the shows on adultswim on Cartoon Network are superb. I like anime because of the focus on plot, and because I actually care what will happen next episode. It’s different and cool.

I didn’t go into much detail last entry about how sitcoms can be so bad, but it’s really intangible beyond recycling storylines. Humor is hard to quantify. Remember that study on the so-called world’s funniest joke?

On the flip side, what can make a sitcom bearable, or, dare I say it, good? That’s a bit easier to describe. I say it’s the characters, the loveable characters.

Locale doesn’t really define a sitcom. Many can easily take place in another city. No, it’s definitely the characters that define a sitcom. “All in the Family” had the bigot, the meathead, and the dingbat. “Cheers” had its cast of bar-goers. “Home Improvement” had Tim, Al, and Wilson. It’s not just the single characters that can make a show good; it’s the interaction between the particular combination of characters. That’s why when a character leaves a show, or enters the show, it can make the show “jump the shark.”

Tomorrow: More on characters.

Sitcoms aren’t viewed as the paragon of TV. I’m not about to disagree with anyone on that point. 99% of sitcoms are crap. And that probably gives a lot of shows too much credit.

Rehashed predictable plots are a mainstay among several sitcoms. I’d have to recommend the short-lived “That’s My Bush” for a parody of the sitcom.

However, bad plots aren’t the worst thing about bad sitcoms; the worst thing would have to be not being funny at all. The main goal of sitcoms is a laugh. If it does not ever achieve this, then the show should never have been made.

So, sure, reusing old formulas is easy, but it’s not always funny because it’s been done before. People don’t remember what happened on the news last week, but they do remember what they’ve seen on TV before. (Ain’t that funny.) In that respect, people know when they’ve been cheated. That commodity they’re being cheated of is the most valuable out there: time. This applies to other genres of shows, as well.

More on Sitcoms tomorrow.

Although television earns its reputation as a visual medium, sound still plays a major role. In particular, dialogue can do a lot. Try just listening to a show once. You’ll probably still be able to tell what’s going on. That’s not to say visuals aren’t important, but that sound does play a big role. The synching of sound and sight, the most dominant senses, allows us to immerse ourselves in the television environment. It gives us a sense of being there and experiencing what’s happening. Undoubtedly, one can get just as immersed in books. However, with books, imagination must play a big role. With television, the audio and visuals take over the role of our imagination, allowing us to sit back and enjoy the show. This is one of the appeals of television.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever had a commercial jingle stuck in your head… yeah, that’s what I thought. Just what is it that makes them persist within our minds? Perhaps that will forever be a mystery. I’m merely noting that at first glance, they may seem insignificant, but they do pervade our lives.

Television show theme songs can do the same thing. Many themes just repeat the title over and over. However, that’s not too different from certain regular songs, if one thinks about it. I’m mentioning this because I have the Lupin III theme song stuck in my head. Television show theme songs can be a big part of the show. Think Twilight Zone music, think Twilight Zone TV show. Zany sitcom like stunts… Come and knock on our door…. The themes are a part of pop culture just as much as the TV shows themselves. I don’t know what to make of that.

This concludes the first day of my musings on television.

I finally saw the movie last Sunday. Here’s some thoughts on it. Hey, if you’re worse than me and still haven’t seen it, don’t read this. Spoilers. They’re hard enough to avoid if you haven’t seen it yet.

Some people said the movie was confusing. I didn’t think it was particularly complicated. The only thing that threw me off a bit was when that bomb exploded, but later I realized that it was just another image, set off by a particular action or word.

I loved the ending. You knew it had to be that guy, but then, he’s right next to Neo. The juxtaposition, excellent. I think they could have done without the “To be concluded” screen, however.

I like staying through the end of the credits. The directors even put their driver on the credits list. At the end, I got to see the teaser trailer for Matrix: Revolutions. Very cool.

The fight scenes made the movie. I was laughing through the scene where Neo fought all the Smiths. At points, I could tell he was CG, but the whole thing still amazed me. What made me laugh was at how surreal it was, and at how Neo could fight all of them at once. It’s kind of like in a video game where you shoot enemy after enemy, but it takes a lot to kill you. The other scenes didn’t make me laugh, but were much more impressive. How in hell did they do the car chase scenes? Who were those crazy stuntpeople?

What was the point of the porno scene with Neo and Trinity? That’s basically what it was. And about the point, I mean besides to just have a sex scene. Seriously, how important was that to the plot?

One of the biggest events in the movie is Neo stopping the machines. So, what is reality? There are hints in the movie pointing to another Matrix before the obvious act. First, the Oracle knowing about Neo’s dreams. Second, the fact that the dream came true. Third, how was Smith able to download himself into that guy’s body? I could be wrong, but that’s what I saw. I bet if I watched the first movie again, I could find hints in the words.

I’ll reiterate for those who missed it, Ringu is a retarded movie. It’s a Japanese movie. They used the plot to make the American horror movie, “The Ring.” I was going to rent The Ring because I’m planning on making a parody of the movie, but they were all out. So, I found Ringu instead.

Big mistake. I’m normally not one for horror movies; in fact, I have a history of falling asleep during them. However, this one was so stupid that I had constantly scoff at its stupidity. I ended up turning it off and didn’t finish the movie.

In the beginning, this girl is supposed to die. The way they do it is dumb. All of a sudden, there’s a negative of the black and white shot of the girl’s face. That’s supposed to be scary? Later on, they have these photos of kids and all their faces are distorted. In my mind, I’m thinking, “Photoshop, blur.” I guess it might be freaky to some people, but not to me.

There’s this cabin that she visits… in the middle of the daytime! And there are kids playing all around! And there are other cabins next to it! Freaky.

Finally the plot plods along to where it’s suddenly night-time and she watches this video. She somehow magically figures out which one it is on a shelf of a whole bunch of videos. (It’s the only one that’s slanted.) And check this out, it’s unlabeled! Scary! She takes it back and watches it. All these semi-weird symbols, etc. Nothing particularly bloody or scary. Yet, when it’s over, she gasps as if watching the video drained all this energy from her. Oh, puh-leaze. Maybe it’s some sort of Japanese thing. Watching Japanese text move around may be scary to them, but when I think of moving text, I think Power Point.

At this point, I turn it off. What a waste of money. Some people claim that the Japanese version is scarier. I haven’t seen The Ring yet, but I’m 100% sure that it can’t be this dumb. Those people need their heads checked.