Author Archives: Shawn R. McDonald

Answering a Second Comment Regarding the Pledge

In response to my entry, Answering a Comment Regarding the Pledge (which answers a comment from my original Pledge entry), Landon said:

So in response of your response, what is the evidence for evolution? I bet you don’t even know it. I completly agree with the first guy.

George Washington states

“Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.”

I found that at the University of Chicago Press’ site. Now explain that. Our founding father states that we are a religious country.

But you are exactly correct about this country; about it being a Democracy, and you have a chance to voice your opinion, but the fact is, America was founded upon religion of the ‘Almighty’ as Washington puts it. If you don’t like what America is, LEAVE, GO SOMEPLACE ELSE. I’m sure Mexico will love you to voice your opinion.

‘Under God’ was put there for a reason. It was during the Cold Wars’ most difficult time.

Pres. Eisenhower states “In this way we are reaffirming the transcendence of religious faith in America’s heritage and future; in this way we shall constantly strengthen those spiritual weapons which forever will be our country’s most powerful resource in peace and war.”

‘Under God’ is simply a reflection of our religious heritage.

First, regarding evolution… Read Charles Darwin’s The Origin of Species. The finches of the Galapagos Islands adapted to fill different ecological niches. Another supporting piece of evidence is that artificial selection produced different dog breeds. Different pressures in nature can produce change in species. How about bacteria that are becoming resistant to certain antibiotics? Explain that without evolution by natural selection. Evolution is defined as a change in allele frequencies within a population. And before any one shouts out anything of macroevolution versus microevolution, I’d like to quote the About.com Agnosticism/Atheism FAQ on evolution: “If you find a creationist arguing that microevolution can occur but macroevolution cannot, simply ask them what biological or logical barriers prevent the former from becoming the latter – and listen to the silence.” From now on, if any one wishes to comment, please read: Evolution is a separate issue from the Pledge of Allegiance. Comments on the two subjects should therefore be separate.

On to the second point regarding George Washington’s address on Thanksgiving… Please look at this page on Thanksgiving from the Smithsonian Institute. I don’t deny that some of the Founding Fathers were religious. I don’t deny that people had religious beliefs when founding this nation. But, I do believe religion is a personal issue, not a state issue. The state should not interfere with religion, and religion should not interfere with the state. Apparently, I’m not the only one: “The next three Presidents proclaimed, at most, two days of thanksgiving sometime during their terms of office, either on their own initiative or at the request of a joint Resolution of Congress. One exception was Thomas Jefferson, who believed it was a conflict of church and state to require the American people hold a day of prayer and thanksgiving. President James Madison proclaimed a day of Thanksgiving to be held on April 13, 1815, the last such proclamation issued by a President until Abraham Lincoln did so in 1862.” You can state privately that you believe America is supported by a god, but the government should issue no laws respecting any religions.

Although you can choose to believe that a god provided the opportunity for the United States to be formed, you can’t deny that people wrote those words, not any god. We are a nation founded by people, not any god. This nation is for the people, not any god. Notice this within address itself: “especially by affording them [the People of the United States] an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.”

Now, look at this, also within the proclamation: “for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed” [emphasis mine]. And is that liberty not infringed upon when a government forces us to pledge to one particular “God”? Even that day of Thanksgiving was but recommended to the American people.

The statement by Eisenhower merely reaffirms that “under God” is meant specifically to endorse religion. I don’t believe that the Constitution allows that. Since I don’t believe in any god, I specifically disagree with the theology behind the statement. We are not “under” any god. The people are subject to their own authority, not any god’s authority. That however, is a different point. The main crux of my argument still is that it is not Constitutional.

I disagree with you about your viewpoint on democracy. I seem to be getting an image that if people disagree with you, they should put up with what you believe, or get out? I believe that democracy involves discourse between disagreeing opinions. If something is wrong, we should try to fix it, not “get out.” Sorry, there are people who disagree with some of your opinions, and they love America just as much as you do. They just may love different aspects of it; for example, I value democracy, republicanism, religious freedom, and discourse. Getting out doesn’t solve anything. Did the Founding Fathers just “get out” when they didn’t like Parliament’s policies? Not that I’m equating the two issues, just making a rhetorical point.

But no, I just love how I have the right to voice my opinion, but if I’m “wrong,” I should be quiet, but still thankful that I can voice my opinion because in other countries they can’t… I just love how that adds up…

Santa and God

Note that God is capitalized, so it’s a proper noun, a name. I’m referring to the Christian God, in this case.

Santa Claus knows when you are sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows if you’ve been bad or good. Santa is omniscient. He knows all. God knows all.

Santa is completely selfless and generous. He creates infinite presents out of infinite raw material. It’s seemingly conjured out of nowhere, almost as if a… miracle… had occured. With his sled, he can defeat the laws of physics. Maybe he controls time to complete his tasks. His powers seem limitless, almost omnipotent.

Santa can reward you for good behavior, or punish you for bad. On a larger scale, this is a reflection of the “afterlife.” Instead of Christmas, it’s the day of your death. The present is heaven, with eternal rewards, and the lump of coal is hell.

The timing also helps the parallelism. Christmas takes place in the winter. Winter can be a symbol for death. Spring is the renewal, and thus, the afterlife.

So is Santa supposed to be Satan or God? Or is he just Santa? I may also attempt to compare Santa to Jesus, but not tomorrow. Tomorrow, I speak of death.

Santa is an anagram of Satan

Is this a coincidence that the letters of Santa can rearrange themselves into Satan? Yeah, of course, but I can still find some superficial similarities between the two.

Let’s take the mythology of Santa and twist it. Santa’s watching, so you better be good. He doesn’t actually want to give you presents. He wants to give you coal. But if you’re good, then he has to give you presents. Against his will. So, on his off-time, he is actually trying to persuade people to be bad. He is the devil when it’s not Christmas Eve.

Santa has elves. Remarkably similar to sweatshops, one could argue. They aren’t elves. They are the souls of the damned, forced to work, and forced to serve the people who are good and holy.

The man lives at the North Pole, where it is extremely cold. Now, extreme heat is usually used to describe hell, but still, these environments both involve extreme temperatures. And no one describes the true interior of Santa’s workshop, or lair. It could very well be hot and toasty, to make the souls of the damned, or elves, suffer.

Don’t believe me? Well, Santa is clad in red…

Tomorrow: Comparing Santa to God

Thanksgiving: The Neglected Holiday

Oh, no Out of Context Awards for November because I couldn’t remember any, and I wasn’t on the lookout for any good ones. I don’t think I heard any.

While listening to the multitude of Christmas songs, I realized that there were no Thanksgiving songs. None. Is Christmas that much better than Thanksgiving? There’s a new Christmas movie coming out. Why are there no Thanksgiving movies? Are there any Thanksgiving cards? If asked, what’s your favorite holiday, how many people would name Thanksgiving?

There’s a lot of commercial opportunity missed here. I’m imagining poems, characters, songs, movies, books, children’s stories, cards, toys… and that’s but the beginning. I’ve thought many times of inventing my own holiday and what it would entail. I always came up blank. Instead of inventing a new holiday, how about reinventing an old one?

The greatest potential lies in the globalization of the holiday. It can definitely be branded as bigger than America, while Americans can still have the pride of inventing the holiday. Christmas is so much bigger than Thanksgiving because it’s celebrated all around. Thanksgiving has no religious connatations, but it can if people want it to. It can potentially reach a bigger market.

Thanksgiving will remain supreme! Christmas will no longer be celebrated before Thanksgiving!

Or maybe it’s a good thing that Thanksgiving has not been commercialized as much as Christmas…

Picture: Justice

Full size

I took a picture of my pencil lead and then, on a whim, decided to entitle it “Justice.” Bonus points to anyone who can figure out any real link between the picture and the title.

EDIT (10:29 PM) – Best one gets to be stolen and embellished by yours truly.

Thankfulness Extravaganza 2003

I am thankful for…

  • Insincere vague thanks that people improvise
  • The people working in grocery stores today who took the jobs from people on strike because the American tradition of Thanksgiving wouldn’t be the same without last-minute shopping
  • All the people starving today because without them, I wouldn’t feel so fortunate
  • All the food that will be thrown away today because somebody might find something good in the trash tomorrow
  • The Native Americans who helped us create the holiday and whom we later killed
  • The poultry industry and everyone else who stands to profit from creating or sustaining holiday traditions
  • The glorious monotony of TV marathons because they keep lesser minds subdued and preoccupied
  • All the Christmas songs that have been constantly playing since before today

Donations: All the Hypocrisy You Can Spare

Campell’s Chunky: Tackling Hunger is just the kind of thing Jesus preached against. Jesus was against charity? No, Jesus was against turning charity into publicity events. Okay, I’m not religious, but you don’t have to be to see the inherent hypocrisy of this.

Take a look at their tagline: “Campbell’s® Chunky™ soup and the NFL™ are teaming up and Tackling Hunger!™” Really, can you have enough trademark symbols? This isn’t charity; it’s corporate whoring.

I find it hypocritical that so many football stars endorse Nike yet still believe they’re charitable by doing publicity stunts like this. Will you help more people by giving them some cans of soup that only last so long, or by helping people earn a living wage?

Buzzwords Describing the Middle-Class

Do you really need to be a proper, trained marketing expert to figure out which words to use? Words not to use: middle class, working class, average people. These convey meanings of mediocrity. People don’t want to be mediocre. They also can convey a sense of class conflict. Many people don’t like to be aware of class conflict and think too much of communism. Words to use: real people. Real is more positive, and also portrays the upper class as phony. I need to think of more words to use and not use.

What’s the relevance of this? It relates to propaganda. I believe that to combat opposing propaganda, you must be successful with your own propaganda. Propaganda isn’t necessarily negative. That’s why I brought up the idea of ads in another entry. So, if I want to help the middle class, and the workers, I need to think of the correct words to use, those which would look more appealing in ads.

Deification of the Corporation

The roots of some of our societal problems today can be traced to the deification of corporations. This is deification as defined as promoting to the status of a deity. Not all deities are benevolent.

We see corporations as these noncorporeal entities seeking to devour all in their path. The deity must feed and grow. It feeds on money. All else does not matter. And yet, we rationalize it. What can you do? It’s a corporation.

I read The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck, recently. There’s a passage in there about the people taking the land away, and they blame it on the bank. The people losing their farms can’t attack the people taking it away, because they only represent the bank. The people don’t know who to fight.

We still don’t know who to fight. You can try to blame it on the CEOs, but propaganda has turned them into victims. They are victims of the corporation. This new deity that must be fed. What can they do?

The problem arises from apathy. We think we can do nothing. We think these corporations are evil monsters that we can’t fight because what is there to physically fight?

But a corporation is made up of people. It is made of CEOs and other board members. It is made of many employees. It is made of the stockholders. It is made up of people.

The corporation isn’t fueled by money. It is fueled by the consumers. The consumers are people.

These people have choices. They should be held accountable for their choices. They can’t blame it on these new undefeatable deities. They can’t explain away their problems from new mythology based on these deities. They can’t pretend that if they appease the deity, it will grant them miracles. Because a corporation isn’t a deity…

A corporation is created and maintained by people.

I Have DSL Once More

Now that I have my DSL back, I want to tell a story:

One time, there was this guy. He patrolled during lunch. My friend and I only saw him at lunch. My friend and I wondered who he was.

My friend would ask, “Who is that guy?”

I would reply, “I do not know.”

So, we continued to see him and lunch, and continued to wonder. Yet after a while, we did not wonder so much as we used to.

Then, one day, we realized that we no longer saw that guy.

I asked, “Who was that guy?”

My friend replied, “I do not know.”

We wondered about his disappearance, and who he was in the first place. No ideas we came up with were satisfactory. We decided that we should find out should the opportunity arise.

If I were to see him again, I would ask that guy, “Who are you?” My friend would also do the same.

Then, we still never saw him. So, I guess it will always remain a mystery.

But if you, or any of your loved ones, can provide any clues to help solve this unsolved mystery, please tell me. Your message can be anonymous. Perhaps you can help me finally figure out, “Who was that guy?”

DSL Down and Out

For those of you who haven’t seen the announcement at Psycho-ward.org, I do not currently have a DSL provider. Since last Wednesday, MSN is no longer providing DSL in my area. So, we signed up for SBC-Yahoo! DSL. They assured us it would be up in 1-5 business days. We install everything on our end on Friday. And of course, it’s not up yet. Call in, we’re going to get service on the 21st of November. One… two… skip the weekend… three… four… five… six… seven. Hm.

Right now, I’m running a free trial AOL 56k service. My modem is really dusty, and when I heard the modem noises, it brought back memories (none of them that great). I haven’t been on Instant Messenger or updating because: 1) I don’t like 56k 2) We only have a limited time that’s free 3) I need a break from the general internet 4) I added a new hard-drive and messed up the partitions, so I can’t access AIM until I fix it.

Beyond Anti-Smoking Ads

Not going to directly talk about them, but the anti-smoking ads do exist. I just wonder if the same type of thing can be done for other issues. You smoke, it’s a vice, and it isn’t guaranteed to kill you. Sweatshops on the other hand…

I doubt states would ever do this, but perhaps if someone had enough capital, they could buy up ad space.

Or maybe, many people could contribute to help buy the ad space — maybe during the next Superbowl.

The first step toward action is awareness.

Answering a Comment Regarding Talking to Strangers

Carol Anne said this about my entry regarding talking to strangers:

I am the victim of theft because I talked to a stranger.

So remember what your mother told you: “Never talk to strangers!”

I am lucky to be alive today to remind all my friends and relatives why one should never talk to strangers.

You say you are the victim of theft because you talked to a stranger. The way you state it, you were directly robbed because you talked to a stranger. Now, I don’t know the situation, but somehow, I doubt that happened directly.

  • Scenario 1: The so-called stranger would have burgled you anyway, even if you had not talked to him.
  • Scenario 2: You placed yourself in a situation where you were more easily burgled after talking to the stranger.
  • Scenario 3: Perhaps it wasn’t theft. Perhaps you were swindled by the thief. In that case, it could have been your gullibility.

Just because you talk to someone, does not mean you trust that person. Young children are told not to talk to strangers because kids are stupid and gullible. Granted some adults are too, but that doesn’t mean everyone should not talk to those they do not know.

Is the old lady sitting by you in the dentist’s waiting room going to rob you? Is the guy standing behind you in line at the bank going to rob you whilst security cameras and a security guard watch?

Simply talking to someone is not an invitation to robbery. At the same time, talking to someone does not mean that person is automatically your friend. If you’re not smart enough to realize that, then maybe you shouldn’t talk to strangers.

Answering a Comment Regarding the Pledge

In response to this entry regarding the Pledge of Allegiance, Selam Fente, 13 said:

I think that “under God” should not be taken out of the pledge of allegiance because our nation was FOUNDED UNDER GOD. The Pilgrims and Seperatists came to America to escape religious persucution. No one is forced to believe in the Christian God, but just because this is now and that was then doesn’t mean that just because our nation has many varieties of people we should forget why America was founded.

As for public schools, I don’t get why in the world you are not allowed to teach to teach Christianity when you can in fact teach evolution. When public schools were founded, the main subject that was taught was the Bible. Now you can’t even tell people about God. That is insane!!!

First off, your two paragraphs address two entirely different subjects. The second paragraph isn’t quite about the Pledge of Allegiance, but I’ll address it anyway. Evolution is a scientific theory. Evolution has evidence. God has no evidence. There is no evidence for any god. Evolution is based on the scientific method. Evolution is an important part of life sciences. Want to be a biologist, but don’t “believe” in evolution? Forget about it, unless you get a job as a pseudo-scientist. Also, I’m not saying schools shouldn’t teach morality, but you don’t need any god to enforce this morality, to make people accept it, or else.

As for the first paragraph, America is not a theocracy. It was founded on the principles of democracy and republicanism. The people you mentioned did not found the United States of America. The USA is a sovereign nation, separate from Britain. I’d suggest you also check your history. Not everyone came to the British colonies to escape religious persecution. In fact, not everyone aboard the Mayflower was a “Pilgrim” and the voyage itself was funded by those with commercial interests. I’m not here to give a history lesson, so I’ll leave more details up to you to find.

The Declaration of Independence mentions inalienable rights. These are the basis of our separation from Britain; America was not founded to escape religious persecution from Britain. Read the actual Declaration of Independence. Do you see anything about religious persecution? The colonies were also rebelling against a King. It states the King’s transgressions. And the King supposedly had his rights handed down to him from God. Do you believe our presidents are chosen by God or the people?

Besides, the Constitution is the foundation of our laws and the basis for how our country is run. Not the Declaration of Independence. Nowhere in the Constitution will you find any mention of any god. Nowhere will you find that this nation was “founded under God.” Our government is not a theocracy.

Since this is a national pledge, according to the Constitution, the words “under God” shouldn’t be there. Read the Constitution. Justify it, using the Constitution. You can’t.

Christianity is not the official religion of the United States of America. According to the CIA World Factbook, 10% report having no religion. This isn’t a tiny number, considering the number of people in America.

From Jefferson’s inaugural address: “All, too, will bear in mind this sacred principle, that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail, that will to be rightful must be reasonable; that the minority possess their equal rights, which equal law must protect, and to violate would be oppression.”

These rights are defined by the Constitution. Although you consider yourself of the majority, you cannot infringe on my right to freely exercise whatever religious ideals I wish to have. The Pledge of Allegiance cannot force the people of America to submit to any god, even your “God.”

I suggest you don’t ignore why the United States of America was founded.

[12/05/03 – EDIT: I answered the comment here with this entry]

Halloween Costume 2003

Here is the promised picture of my Halloween costume:

You were expecting me wearing the costume? You ask too much. No, really, I was just too lazy. I’m lucky I even got this picture up.

And, yes, that is a smile drawn in black Sharpie on the mask. Actually, it was a dry-erase marker, which is why it isn’t so crisp.

Halloweeeen!

My costume consisted of a mirror hanging around my neck, and a reflective face-mask object. I was you for Halloween. At school, the most-used word to describe it was “clever.” It’s an apt word. It’s not uber-hilarious, but it’s still mildly humorous. Shelley, one of Moreau’s APs, thought it was funny. Some people didn’t get it at first. They had to prompt me.

“What’s your costume?”

“I’m you.”

“Oh, I get it. That’s clever.”

Some memorable costumes: Richard in a homemade Mickey Mouse outfit, Ryan as Mr. Rogers, Hans as a Mexican pro-wrestler (El Pollo Loco), Mr. Parker as an oompa-loompah (however you spell it), and Mr. Vargas as Gandhi.

There were only two trick-or-treaters at my house this year, and they were together. Guess why! Guess! It’s because I live on a hill, and those fat-asses are too damn lazy to climb up that far. Each year, we get less and less. At this rate, we’ll have no trick-or-treaters next year. Oh well, more candy for me.

Picture of my costume coming later, probably tomorrow.

[11/05/03 – EDIT: The picture of my costume is found on November 5th’s entry]

100,000 Hits for Psycho-ward

In the month of April, I wrote how my website, psycho-ward.org, had broke 50,000 hits for one month. October was another landmark: 100,000 hits. My hits have doubled in the six-month period.

So, it does seem as if referals grow exponentially. I’m still getting a fair amount of searches for “goldfish jingles” but I’ve got more for TI-83+ Calculator downloads. School brought in new kids curious about my calculators. Oddly enough, I get searches for “games” for the calculator, but I don’t have any on my website, nor do I mention them. I think it’s picking up on “Games” from my main menu.

I also did end up joining buzzComix, and ended up doing fairly well. Then, I switched to Majestic, but then I took a break for the duration of September. When I came back, TWC was done, so many comics came to bCx, and my ranking suffered. I’m now switching back to TPV on the top list since I didn’t update Majestic last month. I lost a piece and I couldn’t continue without it. Anyway, even being lower on the list, I still get more “outs” from bCx than from TWC.

A link to October’s stats in case you’d like to see more numbers.

Here’s hoping for 200,000 hits in one month.

Out of Context Awards: October 2003

Didn’t really pay attention to any good ones, but I managed to get a few.

Runner-up: “Fuck you, neighbor.” My friend Ryan was dressed up as Mr. Rogers for Halloween, this year.

Runner-up: “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. We were talking about Ian dressing up as a Neo-Nazi for next year.” Somehow, we got to talking about dressing up as a Jew for Halloween, and then someone dressing up as Hitler, but then changed it to a neo-nazi. Then, another person tried to join in the conversation after not hearing all of it. Not a good idea when stuff like that is talked about.

Winner: “You’re wiping your hiney with the lungs of the Earth.” – Ms. Armstrong. We were talking about global warming, deforestation, and human consumption, etcetera, in theology class. By the way, is it actually spelled “hiney” because I can’t find the word in any dictionary? Stoopid English colloquialisms.

So there ends this month’s OoCA. I think I had one more quote written down, though. I’ll look for it tomorrow to see if there actually was one. I’ll also be posting about my Halloween costume tomorrow.

Republic Versus Democracy

America is not simply a democracy. Nor is it simply a republic. It is both. It is meant to balance both. Too much republic, and the leaders become tyrannical. Too much democracy, and you’ve only really got an ochlocracy. That’s why it was originally a House of Representatives elected by popular vote, and a Senate elected by state legislatures. That’s why there is an Electoral College.

It’s definitely true that you can’t put too much power in the hands of the general masses. Anendotal example: In English class we were supposed to give a “present” to a character in the novel The Grapes of Wrath. After everyone presented, we were to vote on the best one. Now, some people had some well-thought out gifts, but ones that weren’t too appealing to the general masses. What did appeal to the general masses were breast pumps. People voted, and that’s what won.

Not everyone is a politician, not everyone is informed enough to make important decisions. That’s why we elect representatives. Many people aren’t willing to sacrifice in the short-term to achieve a long-term goal.

Would you rather have a well-educated or an uneducated person lead you? Or, let me put it this way, would you rather have an informed person lead you, or an uninformed person lead you? Not everyone can be trusted to lead. Not everyone is fit to lead. It does make a difference who leads us.

Now, this doesn’t mean that there’s an elite class to rule us, it just means that some people are better leaders than others. And those that are better should be leading. There are less people who can lead than those who can’t. That’s why we can’t just let the general public decide everything.

I’m not going to go into the dangers of lending to much power to the republic side. We all know about the dangers of dictatorship. I just wanted to explain that an ochlocracy is also dangerous.

Let me apply this to the recent successful California governor recall. According to what I said, perhaps you’d think I would’ve been against the recall. Not so. This is because it was at the state level. States are more local and should be influenced more by the general public. The federal government has more distance. States should be able to decide whether a popular vote can recall a state official. California did decide that. The recall was good. As long as the standards are set high enough, it keeps democracy and republic balanced.

Abortion

Just a quick thought… I wouldn’t consider myself “pro-life,” but it seems that the states should decide the issue of abortion, according to the 10th amendment. Hm. I’ll have to think about this some more.

Blinking

Every once in a while, I like to metaphorically take a step back, and then look at things. Lots of things are funny and/or interesting when you stop to think about it. Today, I was thinking about blinking. These flaps of skin flip down for a fraction of a second to moisturize your optical lenses. It doesn’t seem quite that efficient, but what other ways are there to keep the eyes moisturized? You never really notice when someone is blinking, but when that person hasn’t blinked for a while, then you notice it. Blinking is weird, but that’s what I get for writing about an odd topic towards the later hours of the night.

Comment Spam

My comments got spammed sometime last week. Luckily it wasn’t too many entries, so I deleted them. I hope this doesn’t become a bigger problem for me. Hopefully, MT will come out with bulk deletions for comments sometime. I don’t even want to waste any hatred on spam.

Control and Objects

The extent to which I like an object is usually directly related to control. I value things based on how much control they give me. I value computers because of the wide variety of activities I can accomplish with them. I can write what I wish with a pencil.

All these things are very useful and versatile, so shouldn’t I be judging things based on usefulness? Usefulness is a measure of how much control the object gives you.

Another factor is how much control I have over the object. Granted, true AI doesn’t exist, so humans have control over any object they create. I am able to press any button on the remote control. However, there are factors which make things harder to control than others, such as their comprehensibility. When I don’t understand what’s going on, I lack control, so I dislike the object or concept. For example, I like games which aren’t too complicated. Although I sometimes prefer some degree of complexity, this is because it gives me control over those who don’t understand the game. Also, I like it when I can win without an overwhelming amount of effort. That’s also based on my level of control over the game. Mastery is its own reward. This also applies to multiplayer games. I like winning. I like controlling the game to victory, and controlling my opponents to force them to defeat.

At times, I was relating these to influence over people. Control related to my relationships with others is a separate topic, for tomorrow (maybe).

A Part of Me is Missing

I’ve been walking around and I feel like something is missing. Some piece of me is not there. I’m feeling cold and warm at the same time. I’m getting mixed sensations. It’s weird.

I can’t stand it. I need to find that piece. But how can I find it, if I don’t even know what it is? Something is gone, something I thought was always there.

UPDATE: Okay, I found my left sock, and now I’m good.