Author Archives: Shawn R. McDonald

The Lie Committee

As much as colleges like to think of themselves as institutions of higher learning, when you get right down to it, they are businesses. It’s all about the $. It’s all about convincing those prospective students to come to your school, not another school, so they can fork over their cash.

When I saw the kids wandering around JHU with their stupid yellow bags, it made me so angry. I jokingly asked tour guides if they were part of “The Lie Committee” (not around the students). You think admissions is going to tell them that our food fucking sucks and students get food poisoning left and right? You think they’re going to tell them that our food is among the worst in the nation? Naw, they’re going to tell them that they have a plan to be in the top ten by some far off year when you will have already graduated. They’re going to provide you lunch in the Glass Pavillion so you don’t know what our dining halls are really like, so they don’t have to eat with dirty forks and spoons.

I am kicking myself now that I didn’t distribute to the prospective students my satirical news article on the grody shower curtains. Give them a sense of how life is really like.

I never visited JHU, but if I had, it wouldn’t have told me shit. What the hell does a tour telling you all about historical inanities have to do with what this school is really like? I almost died in Econ lecture the other day, barely staying awake. Then, our professor puts on a show the day he realizes there are prospective students there. That was pretty slick, I must admit.

The showers in our bathroom are out of order. All three of them. Only one of the showers downstairs has a shower curtain. The other day, they had three guys working on them, and they still are out of order. Of course, they decided to pick a day late in the week so that our showers can stay broken the whole weekend. I’m sure that any problems with the showers aren’t recent, urgent problems. I’m convinced that they postponed work on the showers until after prospective students were here. I’m convinced they could have taken care of this problem earlier so that it wouldn’t be a major inconvenience the entire weekend. I’m convinced they purposely did it this way so we couldn’t go to the housing office and complain, since the place is closed on weekends.

So, on that note, I’d like you to read this article, College editor fights for newspaper. The administration removed the school newspapers from a rack near the admissions office. You know why? Because the lead article was about crime on campus. Like I said, it’s all about the $. Better hide the bad things about your campus.

Honestly, even though I decided not to transfer, I still don’t know what the hell I’m doing at Johns Hopkins. I still don’t like it. I have a little bit of hope for next year, but not much. The only thing I’m looking forward to is my role in the College Republicans. If only I could come up with some good idea, I would gladly give up college in a heartbeat.

Spring Fair Food Fest

Well, Spring Fair is here at JHU. There’s all sorts of stuff out there… entertainment, rides… but what I really care about is the food! I’m just so ecstatic about all the food out there because I hate my meal plan and the shitty food they give us.

It’s really crazy because every time I go out, I just smell the food, and I have to buy some… even if I’m not that hungry. Apparently, one of my schoolmates told me that my predicament reminded her of a test they were doing on lab rats.

There was also a guy with a booth and he was handing out socialist propaganda. Woah.

Anyway, I plan on eating chicken-on-a-stick all weekend. Indeed, I plan to spend the whole weekend eating. Most of today has been spent munching or sipping.

Outknit Saddam

I must admit, I love playing those games that are really advertisements. You know the ones… On the internets… the interactive banner ads. I really liked this one where you had to kick these ninjas. It was actually kind of challenging because you had to get the timing exactly right. Well, today I saw the most bizarre game ever: Outknit Saddam.

Outknit Saddam

What were they smoking when they thought up that one?

Facebook Status Listlog

Facebook recently added a new feature that allows you to put your “status.” That is, you can leave a note telling people that you are “at home” or “at the library” or “in class”. Or, you can put something custom. At first, I thought this was a rather creepy new feature. I elected to put “none of your goddamned business” as my status. Now, I’m positively enamoured because of all the hilarious things people put. It’s the greatest invention of its kind since the AIM profile. It’s a bizarre little window into a slice of life. It could be what the person is feeling, what they’re doing, or something clever. What makes it great is its brevity. Just one little thing in there, and people can find out what’s happening to you at the moment. They’re so fun to browse. I’m not sure quite how to why I think they’re so great… but in aggregate, they acquire some kind of artistic quality… Facebook pointillism, that’s what it is. So, here’s a sample of what some of my facebook “friends” are doing… and myself at the top:

  • You are waiting for Godot…
  • Daryl is a cute little boy.
  • Ryan is punching killer bees.
  • Andrew is diet pepsi.
  • Kate is pissed off that my internet isn’t working and am hijacking the roomie’s computer without her consent.
  • Clara is in a dryer.
  • Laura is %&*#(*@&*#*&*#!!!!!!
  • Amy is making out with haribo gummibearz.
  • Wade is Trying to avoid homework.
  • Ashley is dreaming in japanese.
  • Ying is agonizing over which shoes to wear: the green flip flops…or the brown flip flops?
  • Lingsheng is going to hurt/kill someone.
  • Paige is workin on a paper <3.
  • Alex is round the way, parlayin’ on the regular.
  • Ashley is weirded out by this new feature.
  • Nicole is mobilizing rebel forces.
  • Matt is Batman.
  • Jude is not going to like this week at all.
  • James is a Native American.
  • Kendra is rolling around on the sidewalk.
  • Michael is making Kool-aid. Oh Yeah.
  • Eric is so good…damn.
  • Heather is internally conflicted.
  • Yessen is fucking some insatiable hopkins whore for almost an hour and she keeps yelling more and more! WTF?
  • Grace is unproductive.
  • Tym is mooing…
  • Gloria is kung fu fighting!!
  • Ryan is indeterminant.
  • Khang is actually just a figment of your imagination.
  • Ben is somewhere you’ll never reach.
  • Daniel is coked out.
  • Vikram is your mom.
  • Jeff is facebook is getting creepy.
  • Marcus is back home :(.
  • Ingrid is …Oh Good God! – it’s 1984 – Big Brother/Facebook. The two are synonymous!
  • Charlie is still breathing!
  • Nick is masturbating.
  • Ethan is At Beta apreciation week.
  • Stevie is your MOM.
  • Ben is with your mom.
  • Nicole is doing victoria.
  • Cassie is in your closet.
  • Jessica is dancing. Duh.

Rousseau Quote

“Born a citizen of a free State, and a member of the sovereign, the right to vote in it is enough to impose on me the duty to learn about public affairs, regardless of how weak might be the influence of my voice on them. Happy, whenever I meditate about Government, always to find in my inquiries new reasons for loving that of my country!” — Jean Jacques Rousseau, Of the Social Contract

Me too!

Centennial of the 1906 Quake

100 years ago, today, there was a hella big earthquake in San Francisco. 100 years ago, they would not have said “hella”. A lot has changed since then. And some things haven’t changed.

Mainly, I want to bring your attention to this article, Bay Area far from ready for the next ‘Big One’, from MSNBC. (I found it via Cosmic Log.) There are lots of problems to be had. I’m all for spending as much money as it takes.

Scary statisic: “About half of the 484 hospital structures in the Bay Area would probably collapse after a major quake, according to projections by the Office of Statewide Health Planning and Development. Only about 15 percent would be more or less able to function, it said, and just 1 percent would be fully functional.”

Fires did a lot of damage during the 1906 quake. The news on that is more encouraging: “The gas lines are underground today, and they’re built to flex with the earth during a quake, said McLean of the Pacific Earthquake Engineering Research Center. Except for those that lie directly along the major faults, many should remain intact.”

Still, we should really focus on retrofitting our infrastructure. Water could be a potential problem: “So vulnerable is the infrastructure that water-related losses would top $6 billion in a ‘major event’ along the San Andreas Fault, the East Bay consultants projected in 2002.” We really need water for disaster response and more.

After Katrina, I said we should start preparing for an earthquake now. I still stand by that statement.

On a different (but still-earthquake related) note, check out Lloyd’s entry on the 1906 earthquake. Very interesting.

Is this picture real?

Nothing to do with immigration. This is a suicide bomber. However, the picture doesn’t look right. The lighting doesn’t look right on the guy as opposed to the background. And look at his hair! It’s pretty obvious that someone cut him out, not very well, and plopped it in this autumn background. The only question is: Why? Why the hell would someone do that? What does the real picture look like, the one he was cut out of? (Okay, so Why? isn’t the only question.)

But Isn’t Bush For Immigration?

These immigration protest pictures from AP and Reuters are great.

Check out this lady. She’s holding a sign that says “immigrants are humans.” Well, duh, but illegal immigrants aren’t citizens. There’s a difference. There’s a notion of sovereignty that we must pay attention to.

I decided to pay a visit to her website, “WorldCantWait.Org.” Guess what the world can’t wait for? To drive Bush out! It’s a supremely anti-Bush site, which I found extremely ironic. Bush is for a guest worker program and all that jazz. What drivel.

On the bottom of this picture and in this picture, you can see the logo from that “World Can’t Wait” site. It looks as if it’s been translated into Spanish. How silly! They all hate Bush so much! Even though he’s for a guest worker program? Here too. I wonder if the silly World Can’t Wait people just plopped themselves in the rally to pretend as if all the immigrants supported their cause.

Here’s a wonderful picture of a kid waving a Mexican flag, something you’d probably never find in the LA Times or NY Times.

I’d like to know more about this story: “The march is dedicated to 14-year-old Anthony Soltero. Soltero committed suicide after allegedly being threaten by a school official for participating in immigration protests.” I’ll do some research tomorrow.

Check out the Full Rights For All Immigrants sign, which demonstrates the entitlement mentality. Yeah, why don’t you keep on marching up to Canada and demand free healthcare too!

The Apprentice and Product Placement

Personally, I think The Apprentice is a brilliant show because it’s just one big advertisement for several companies. Donald Trump didn’t just make a TV show. He somehow created a way to be “subtle” when loudly plugging products and companies. It’s blatant while pretending not to be blatant, as if advertisement is normal in a TV show.

The New York Times (I need to write something one of these days that doesn’t reference the NY Times) put out an article on The Apprentice, claiming that “‘The Apprentice’ has pushed the boundaries for product placement, creating challenges centered on any number of consumer goods (and plugging them). In an episode shown last week, for example, the contestants competed to sell a new sandwich offered by 7-Eleven.”

Even though I think the product placement on The Apprentice brilliant, I find it difficult to agree with the claim of the New York Times. At heart, The Apprentice is a game show, not reality TV. Nothing can ever beat The Price is Right at product placement.

Medicaid Hurdle Not So High?

Yesterday, I commented on a New York Times article about how new restrictions to require ID in order to get Medicaid may hurt people other than illegal immigrants.

Well, check out this paragraph from Slate: “The NYT tries to justify the arbitrary timing of its Medicaid lead by pegging it to the immigration debate. The story, however, focuses on poor people who are in the country legally but may be denied benefits because they lack documentation. Those who may lose their medical coverage include African Americans and Native Americans who never received birth certificates and don’t have passports, as well as elderly patients who may not understand the new requirement. After letting your outrage brew for 22 paragraphs, the Times mentions that the government is working on a policy to accommodate the needs of these groups.”

The New York Times’s brouhaha over this Medicaid policy may actually be a non-story. The bill doesn’t go into effect until July 1st and so I don’t know if this will even be an issue by then.

Anyway, thinking about it some more, I’m still not sure what to think. It all depends on how they actually verify citizenship. If kids grab fake IDs all the time, I’m sure an illegal immigrant can grab one. Furthermore, if these illegal immigrants are “living in the shadows,” how are they getting Medicaid? I’d like to see some data on the impact of illegal immigration on Medicaid. Of course, I’m still of the mind that if we enforced our laws in the first place, we wouldn’t have this problem.

Illegal Immigration and Medicaid: Proceed With Caution

According to the article Medicaid Hurdle for Immigrants May Hurt Others, new requirements to have ID may harm older people and Native Americans, along with illegal immigrants. When dealing with this problem of illegal immigration, proceed with caution. That’s part of the conservative way, anyway. I’m not sure how much I can support this measure if it ends up costing hospitals more. If we enforced border security in the first place, we wouldn’t need laws like this.

On Freedom

Some proto-thoughts on freedom…

Men, in their hearts, want to be free. All men are born with this desire. However, men are not born with the knowledge of how to live free. This, they must learn. By the West, this was deduced by reason, learned through trial and error, and bought with bloodshed over the course of centuries.

Manifest Destiny II

I thought I had come to a conclusion. Regarding illegal immigration, I was convinced that the most sensible, realistic political solution, for the GOP at least, is a phased plan that includes a fence, penalties for employers, and then amnesty for illegals after a number of years. That was the short-term, GOP don’t lose the midterms, political solution. However, that solution is not necessarily the right solution. I have renounced that position and discovered a new, radical, positive, truly American vision. You will probably be surprised to find out that I now favor open borders.

To understand, you must accompany on this journey in transcending the realm of purely political thinking. Today, Lloyd talked about the symbolic implications of a wall. If we build a wall, it says: The American Dream is for us and no one else. It encourages a bunker mentality.

Glenn Reynolds brings up the idea of annexing Mexico. When I really think about it, does opening the borders really mean we’ll be overloaded with a flood of Mexicans… or does it mean something else? If we enacted open borders that were two-way, we would see American businesses and entrepreneurs flooding into Mexico, in fact. There’s opportunity for all sorts of factories and development. If it were two-way, we would not face a sort of death by demography, but something that would actually be quite good for America, I think.

Agree with the war in Iraq or not, there’s something to be said about exporting democracy to another country — to exporting our ideals. Part of the American ideology is not that this dream is only meant for us: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And is that not what these immigrants, legal or otherwise, seek? Pursuit of happiness? It doesn’t seem to make sense to me, considering the notion of sovereignty, that people are entitled to be American, but it is true that all people are endowed with our same dream.

I’ve been faced with a cognitive dissonance lately. I’ve been thinking with an “under siege” mentality. I think “These people are not entitled to these things.” Yet, the message of America as a beacon of hope in the world remains strong. It remains the core of my nationalism. I struggle to reconcile these within my mind. I want to think radically, and then I realize that there really is nothing new under the sun.

We live in a time of sequels, just check out our movies if you don’t believe me. We got Bush II and Gulf War II. I think it’s time for Manifest Destiny II. It should be our goal to expand the American ideal across the Western Hemisphere and the world. I’m sure we could twist the Monroe Doctrine enough that it says just that.

If we really believe in the universality of our ideals, then we should not worry about a “Mexican invasion.” Tell me, what ideals does Mexico espouse that can be stronger than ours? We are stronger and will remain stronger because America is not reliant on demography. America is more than a place. America is more than America. America is an idea more than anything else. Of freedom, of democracy, of hope and promise, of everybody being able to achieve what they dream of to the best of their abilities.

Now is not the time to hunker down, especially not in these times of peril. Now is the time to expand. Now is the time to prove that what we believe is right. We also face a war of ideology against Islamofascists, and we must prove that we are a true democracy. We must prove to them that they are the hypocrites, not us. We must prove to them that our ideas work best, not their twisted perversions of God and faith. We must prove that America really is America.

In that sense, we face a deeper threat than any our nation has faced before. In the Civil War, we faced the separation of our Union, but we pulled through and freed the slaves. In WWII, we faced an external threat. During this War on Terror, we face an enemy that does not have the physical strength to defeat us for it is an enemy that is psychological in nature. In facing this enemy, we face the danger of becoming that very same enemy. We risk not being destroyed by others, but destroying ourselves, destroying the very fabric of America.

I’ve had a thought come to me several times, and it applies to all realms of warfare: You must define the enemy before he defines you. In this War on Terror, we are losing because we are letting the enemy define us. The rest of the world does not love us, and they don’t love the American ideal. It’s time to change that, and it starts here, right in our own backyard. It starts with Mexico.

Open the borders. However can the weaker defeat the stronger? I don’t think it will end up with a Mexican takeover of the US. Instead, it will be a US economic takeover of Mexico.

Indeed, the opening of borders contains a truly conservative ideology within it. Mexican workers will send remittances back home, which helps them economically more than foreign aid. We don’t want to hand people in our own country welfare checks instead of letting them work for it. Why should we restrict this policy domestically? Does it not make sense to let them work and build up their country themselves?

And with a border open two-ways, our businesses will also travel into Mexico. They will further the development and the Mexican people will be deeply indebted to America.

To my readers, I implore you to always think bigger, as I am attempting to do. Opening the borders is not an act of destroying our sovereignty. Instead, it is a de facto annexation of Mexico. We will not alienate the Latino people as the Europeans have alienated the Arabs living amongst them. We will not tell them that they have no right to aspire to become what we are. We will let our neighbors embrace the American Dream. And once Mexico has gained, we will extend this throughout the Western Hemisphere… until the spectre of socialism is finally abolished. Until the people abandon Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez. Until the people realize that America truly believes in what she says.

I am young and will not trap myself in the ideologies of my predecessors. No, I tell you, when indeed I become a politician, I will still not let myself become trapped.

I hope to become one who can transcend the traditional framework, and to be able to communicate that to everyone.

In calling it Manifest Destiny, I mean not to invoke an American arrogance and exceptionalism. If you’ve read any of what I wrote, my message is not one that excludes. My message is one of hope for all people.

Immigration Advocates Rally Across Canada

Crowds of immigrants and their supporters marched today in many Canadian cities, casting off the old fears of illegal status to assert that they have a right to free healthcare in Canada. Twelve million American liberals, tired of attempting to pass legislature for universal healthcare in the United States, have moved to Canada without documentation, in order to receive what they believe they have a right to, what all humans have a right to.

All over Canada, undocumented American immigrants finally came out of the shadows, waving upside-down Canadian flags while demanding dignity. The marches took place in big cities like Toronto and Montreal, and smaller communities as well. Some of the marchers invoked tactics of the civil rights era, and others simply came because they shared a deep hatred for George W. Bush.

In Ottawa, Ontario, rally organizers estimated the crowd to be about 100,000. Local police placed the crowd around 20,000. Still, it was the largest rally the sleepy Canadian metropolis had ever seen.

One man, Howard Reid, 54, was at the rally with his wife and his child. He explained the importance of bringing his child to this event, “My kid is marching for what’s rightfully his. He was a poor orphan until one day he broke into my house and demanded that I raise him. We’re here to make his dream come true for children all around the world.”

The rallies, part of what some organizers were calling the National Day for Immigrant Entitlement, drew the unemployed, ex-felons, old hippies, lazy bums, and babies in strollers. The marches were peaceful, and many of them had a picnic-like atmosphere, with obnoxious American pop music providing a backdrop to the assertive talk of new rights for a group that has until recently lived ostracized, trapped in dark enclaves such as MoveOn.Org.

Fears of xenophobia rose as one or two Canadians staged counter-protests, politely asking the Americans not to be so loud. Dianne Clinton, 33, an American mother of fifteen children who lack healthcare, was asked about her reaction to Canadian claims that the Americans were not going to assimilate.

“I’ve always wanted to assimilate into Canadian culture,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to leave my door unlocked, and I hate George W. Bush. I’ve wanted to be a Canadian since a famous movie star said he’d move to Canada if Bush won in 2000.”

Although they were far from the birthplace of the civil rights movement, several signs evoked imagery of the movement led by Dr. Martin Luther King. One such sign read, “We have a healthcare dream too.” Other signs called for equality: “Illegals are still citizens!”

“We are in a situation that Rosa Parks was in several years ago: enough is enough,” said Lionel Newman, 32, who came here from Detroit and now spends his time in a park in Edmonton. “Martin Luther King once had a dream that all people would have free healthcare, no matter what nation they happened to come from. We have that dream too.”

The marches come at a time when Parliament – and indeed, the nation – is torn over what to do with this burgeoning population of undocumented American immigrants.

A recent poll released by CBC News indicated that 70 percent of Canadians agree with the statement: “They’re just here to mooch off our healthcare, and they should get oot of here.”

In Calgary, the demonstrators protested a recent Canadian bill that would give all Americans healthcare provided they learned to adopt a Canadian accent. They were joined by the mayor, Dave Brokennier.

“I want to express support for the Calgary American community,” he said. “All people, no matter where they come from, deserve free Canadian healthcare without any restrictions. I oppose this mean-spirited legislation.”

This piece of satire was inspired by (and directly lifted some language from) the April 10, 2006 article,
Immigration Advocates Rally Across U.S.
, by Maria Newman of the New York Times.

The Republican Amnesty Secret

Psst… let me let you in on a little secret… I’m actually okay with amnesty for the current illegals… I think you can get most of the Republican base to put up with it too…

You wouldn’t guess it from my writing but I think amnesty is sensible… Then why the tough talk, right? Keep listening…

I’m doing this because if the GOP base doesn’t talk tough, we’ll end up with a repeat of 1986… So, if you want us to put up with an amnesty, convince us that it won’t be a repeat of 1986… Get it?

Translation: Build a wall, and then we’ll talk… No really, guarantee it… Build the wall first… Secure our borders first… Then, we can sensibly agree to amnesty instead of deportation… In the spirit of forgiveness, I would be okay with amnesty… After all, let he who is without sin cast the first stone, right?

Still… There’s a reason why this is a secret… Between you and me, amnesty is fine… but you can’t let anyone know because then they won’t secure our borders… They’ll give amnesty and let future illegals flow into the country…

Alright, wall first… then we can “compromise”… until then, more tough talk…

Immigrant Rights Propaganda Watch: Living in the Shadows

I’m going to pull from another article from the New York Times to show the latest propagandist language from illegal immigration activists. This one’s called Across the U.S., Growing Rallies for Immigration by Robert D. McFadden.

Check out this backward language: “The crowds at many of the protests also cheered speakers who denounced a system that has driven more than 11 million illegal immigrants into shadowy lives of subterfuge”

Wait, so these people come into the country illegally, and they’re saying the system forced them underground? It’s not the system that’s forcing them into such a life; they’re the ones that came in illegally. It’s like somebody who robs a store. If you live your life on the lamb, it’s not the system that’s forcing you to live a life of subterfuge.

See, they think they have a right to an American citizenship: “Demonstrators flying banners of immigration reform marched in cities across the nation yesterday to demand citizenship and a share of the American dream for millions of illegal immigrants who have run a gantlet of closed borders, broken families, snake-eyed smugglers and economic exploitation.” They think they have a right to live here, but they don’t. They don’t have that right anymore than I have a “right” to live in Mexico. They’re demanding citizenship, but they have no right to that citizenship, especially if they came in here illegally. No one is forcing them to live in the shadows. They have the wrong idea. You can’t demand citizenship from any nation you want and then say you’re forced to live in the shadows if you don’t get it. If a kid demands candy from his parents, does that mean he has a right to that candy? Does he then say that his parents oppress and starve him if they don’t give him that candy? Of course, to make this analogy truly proper: This kid is demanding candy from somebody else’s parents!

It’s not the system that’s wrong, unless you’re against the idea of a nation-state. Then, of course, you must ask yourself, “Who the hell is going to protect my rights if there’s no nation-state?”

Immigrant Rights Propaganda Watch: Rosa Parks

Watch out again for the stupid “illegal immigrant rights” equals “civil rights” propaganda! Check out this NY Times story, Immigrants Rally in Scores of Cities for Legal Status, by Rachel L. Swarns. For some reason, the New York Times thought it would be cool to reprint this quote:

“‘We are in the situation that Rosa Parks was in several years ago,’ said Mr. Rodriguez, who works in the landscaping business. ‘Enough is enough.'”

They really want to hammer home that point, eh?

Well, I can repeat myself too. Even though, “some marchers invoked the tactics and slogans of the civil rights era,” their rallies have nothing to do with civil rights. Civil rights belong to citizens. That’s not being xenophobic. That’s a FACT of SOVEREIGNTY. The United States is not a sovereign entity if everyone is entitled to our benefits. They just don’t understand the notion of a nation, or the notion of laws. That’s why illegal immigrants are a threat to our sovereignty. What happens when illegal immigrants can march in your country and change your laws?

75% Concur, But Nation Still Torn

I’m such a tease. I said I was going to show out and out bias, but it’s really not so bad as that. Let’s look at these two paragraphs together.

Paragraph one: “The rallies are coming at a time when Congress — and indeed, the nation — seems torn about what to do about the burgeoning numbers of immigrants who are coming into the country every year.” Alright, so the nation is torn about what to do about these illegal immigrants who storm into our country and then demand things.

Paragraph two: “A poll released today by The Washington Post and ABC television showed that 75 percent of Americans believe United States authorities are not doing enough to stop illegal immigration.”

So let’s see, 75% agree that we’re not doing enough to stop illegal immigration. 75% of the people want something done! Even though 3/4s of the people agree, the New York Times says that the nation is torn. To me, it seems pretty fucking obvious what the American people want: Enforce our laws and secure our borders.

Message to Congress: You shouldn’t be torn. 75% of the people! Hello!

What’s up with all this obfuscation?

Coming up tomorrow: Beautiful, beautiful satire.

The Latest Propaganda Techniques of the Illegal Immigration Lobby

Required reading for today: Immigration Advocates Rally Around U.S. by Maria Newman of the New York Times. From it, you can glean the latest propaganda techniques from the pro-illegal immigration groups.

The first important propaganda technique is the tying of illegal immigration to civil rights.

It’s interesting that the New York Times saw fit to print this paragraph twice:

“We are in a situation that Rosa Parks was in several years ago: enough is enough,” said Fabian Rodríguez, 38, who came here from Mexico and now lives in the Atlanta suburb of Norcross and works as a landscaper. “I want things to work out in our favor, or we go back to our country. But we can’t keep living the way it is now.” They were supporting immigrant rights nationally and protesting state legislation awaiting Gov. Sonny Perdue’s signature that would require adults seeking many state-administered benefits to prove they are in the country legally.

Once on the first page, and once on the second page, eh? I guess they really want to hammer home that civil rights connection. I bet the NY Times will change this sooner or later, but I took screenshots to put in here later.

Also, see the latest technique in this paragraph:

“There were many signs here that marchers were aware of the South’s history as the cradle of the black civil rights movement. At the beginning of the march, demonstrators held a banner that spanned the width of their procession that read, ‘We have a dream too.'”

Let’s consider the irony of this propaganda technique. Civil rights? Rights that belong to… citizens? They’re not citizens. They don’t have “civil” rights when they enter this country illegally. Our government has no obligation to protect them.

The next propaganda technique is that of controlling the crowds and telling them to wave American flags, even though they don’t think of this as their country.

You will see that here: “Most of the marchers carried American flags, as the word has gone out to demonstrators over the last few weeks over the Internet and flyers that they needed to show more willingness to assimilate, although some carried flags from their home countries of Mexico, Honduras and Nicaragua.”

The NY Times says most marchers carried American flags; however, the LA Times has already lied about flags. Furthermore, if you look at the pictures included with the article, you will see a lot of red, white, and blue. You’ll see a kid wrapped in an American flag with the Washington Monument as a backdrop. Aw… gives you the warm fuzzies, don’t it. But wait, let’s take a closer look at the first picture. That’s not even an American flag. It’s a flag of Puerto Rico. Alright, Puerto Rico’s part of America… I’ll give them that, but I still see a lot of Mexican flags. Note the Mexican flag almost hidden by the “USA Built By Immigrants” sign they obviously wanted to highlight.

Another note… it’s interesting how the NY Times says “Some of the marchers invoked the tactics and slogans of the civil rights era, and others were trying out a new voice for an emerging constituency that in the very recent past has hidden from authority because of their lack of papers, afraid to speak up, willing to work for wages that American citizens will not accept” when someone’s holding a sign that says “Raise minimum wage.”

The next propaganda technique is related to the first technique. That of the language of “rights.” As I said earlier today, the language of “immigrant rights” is a crock.

The first paragraph of the NY Times article sets up the language of “rights”: “In rallies that appeared to be exceeding the expectations of organizers and the police, hundreds of thousands of immigrants and their supporters marched today in more than 100 cities throughout the country, casting off the old fears of their illegal status to assert that they have a right to a humane life in this country.”

No, they do not have a right to a humane life in this country. They have rights in their own country, not this one. No non-citizen is guaranteed American rights. No one has the “right” to move to America.

More language here: “marchers carrying signs about their rights and the competing bills in Congress.” Watch out for signs talking about “rights.”

More from the double-paragraph: “They were supporting immigrant rights nationally and protesting state legislation awaiting Gov. Sonny Perdue’s signature that would require adults seeking many state-administered benefits to prove they are in the country legally.” These people are not entitled to any of our states benefits if they are not citizens. It flies in the face of the notion of a sovereign nation-state. Does an American have the right to free healthcare in Canada? No! Then, a Mexican doesn’t have the right to any healthcare or welfare in the USA.

So, these are the three latest propaganda techniques of the illegal immigration lobby. They speak of immigrant rights, as if they have a “right” to live in our country. They tie this to civil rights. This makes no sense because civil rights are conferred to citizens, not illegal immigrants. This is why they are a threat to our sovereignty. Then, they fly American flags, as if they really cared about America, when they don’t. Otherwise, the guy the NY Times quotes wouldn’t mangle the notion of civil rights by tying his movement to Rosa Parks and then saying, “I want things to work out in our favor, or we go back to our country.” [Emphasis all mine] Yeah, they’re all American… yeah sure.

I have highlighted the propaganda techniques of the movement, but in my next entry, I want to reveal the PURE OUTRIGHT BIAS from the NY Times itself.

Immigrant Rights?

I don’t understand the concept of “immigrant rights,” especially since it really refers to “illegal immigrants.” It’s quite simple, really. If you break into my house and decide you want to live there, you have no right to demand that I serve you breakfast. You have no right to demand that I give you a job cleaning my house if you have broken into my house. I don’t care how hardworking you are or what kind of family you have to feed — you broke into my fucking house. By coming into the country illegally, you have broken into the house that is America. And if I really want to compare it to illegal immigration, it’s as if you broke into my house and trashed my front yard as you came in. Illegal immigrants are trashing the ecosystems along the border. Then, once you come into my house, I relent and say, “Okay, you’re not that bad; I’ll let you work,” and then 11 million of your friends come a-knocking on my door.

I don’t understand how anyone can’t figure out that picture. It shows an inherent disrespect for the laws of our country. People think everything’s a “right” these days. No one has any “right” to come to America. Unfortunately, life isn’t fair. If I’m a poor orphan kid, I have no right to break into a rich guy’s house and demand that he raise me. We’ve got a country to keep running, and you can’t just let everyone in here.

This shows us how bad the problem really is : “Asked whether she was afraid to parade her undocumented status in front of a massive police presence, she laughed and said: ‘Why? They kick us out, we’re coming back tomorrow.'”

They don’t care about our laws.

And after this next quote, I’m almost tempted to say, “Fine, let’s codify an underclass.”

“‘We all know pay is not the same everywhere and lot of people won’t work for the minimum here, so if they won’t take the job, what’s the problem?’ said 47-year-old Jose Salazar.”

Again, they don’t understand our laws.

Taken all together, I don’t think I’m over-reacting when I say that a serious threat is posed to our sovereignty. Or at least to the border states. If you keep marching in our streets waving foreign flags, it’s going to get ugly. I have a feeling things are only going to get worse.

Two New Blows to Intelligent Design

Two New Discoveries Answer Big Questions In Evolution Theory, by Sharon Begley, describes two new scientific discoveries which help refute the claims of Intelligent Design. First, the discovery of Tiktaalik roseae further illustrates how fish began to evolve into land-dwelling animals. Next, a discovery about hormones and receptors further discredits the idea of “irreducible complexity.” Science keeps marching on, and all Intelligent Design can do is make the same hackneyed claims.

Wakey Wakey…

I just woke up… I’m sure waking at 3:00 is nothing for some people, but to me, and most of America, it’s pretty ridiculous.

Note: I am currently on the East Coast, but my weblog is still set for Pacific Time. Although, currently, most of my time is spent in Maryland, my home is still California. I base this both on personal sentiments and the fact that I am registered to vote in California.

Immigration Bill Stalled in Senate

Hooray: “Landmark legislation offering eventual citizenship to millions of illegal immigrants suffered a potentially fatal blow Friday in the Senate.” — Immigration Overhaul Obstacle May Be Fatal

The AP unintentionally tells us what this immigration bill in the Senate really is: Amnesty for illegals. The American people don’t want illegal immigrants pouring through our borders. We want secure borders. Granting amnesty rewards people for breaking the law and encourages future law-breaking. We already gave them amnesty in 1986. It’s time to close the borders now.

Forget talks of a compromise bill. The only compromise involved in that kind of bill is our security. Secure our borders first. Then, we’ll talk.

The Latest Bad News From Iraq

From the Associated Press: Mosque Suicide Bombers Kill 79 in Baghdad. Further sectarian violence, this time Sunnis attacking a Shiite mosque. We also have Shiite militias still causing trouble. Unfortunately, we’re stuck in Iraq, and I think we’ll have to preside over civil war until it ends in bloody stalemate in order to prevent anyone else from coming in (*cough* Iran *cough*) and screwing things up worse than they are now.

Thomas Young Quote

Quote of the day: “Although I have readily fallen in with the idea of assisting you in your learning, yet [there] is in reality very little that a person who is seriously and industriously disposed to improve may not obtain from books with more advantage than from a living instructor… Masters and mistresses are very necessary to compensate for want of inclination and exertion: but whoever would arrive at excellence must be self-taught.” — Thomas Young, letter to his brother, 1798

I agree. My friend Richard disagrees. Anyone else?

Possible Security Problem in Congress?

There’s some stuff being bandied about on Cynthia McKinney, but I don’t really care about people crying about race-baiting. I have some legitimate concerns about security. Here’s the low-down to keep you up to date: AMERICAblog on McKinney: “McKinney waltzes into the Congress the other day, bypasses the security checkpoint (which members of Congress are permitted to do), but she doesn’t identify herself as a member of Congress and isn’t wearing her ID pin that ALL members of Congress are required to wear when at work (for the very reason that there are 535 of them, and it’s not always clear who’s a member). It’s that pin that tells the cops at the metal detector that she’s a member of Congress and not a walking human bomb.”

I wonder how that ID pin works. Is it just a piece of plastic?

Bruce Schneier elaborates on the problem of forged credentials. In this situation, how easy would it be for someone to forge a pin and sneak right into Congress? (And God knows what he or she will do.)

Furthermore, there’s probably no need to even forge an ID pin. Just walk past the security gate like McKinney did and then get a running start over the security officer.

I’m no security expert, but maybe it’s better if we search members of Congress instead of giving them a free pass. It solves the false identification problem and solves the Cynthia McKinney problem. It doesn’t leave this wide gap in their security that’s easy to get around. However, the only problem it creates is the “inconveniences Congress” problem. I think that’s a sacrifice they should be willing to make.

LA Times Laugh Out Loud Article on Immigration and Katrina

I’m sure some people don’t find it as funny, but the ridiculous bias is laughable in this LA Times article, Migrants Find a Gold Rush in New Orleans. It talks about the illegal aliens flooding into New Orleans, and in the process tries to paint a positive light on all of illegal immigration.

First, I just can’t help but feeling them attempting to force the warm fuzzies through me: Oh, these illegal immigrants can’t be that bad; they’re rebuilding the city of New Orleans. You might give the LA Times the benefit of the doubt, but wait until you hit this line: “As the Senate debates new immigration laws and marchers demonstrate across the country, these immigrants offer another reminder of the country’s reliance on undocumented labor from Latin America.” Our country’s reliance? When only 5% of our workforce is foreign, which means a lower percentage is illegal.

Then, the LA Times makes an oddly framed claim: “While the South’s feeble economy, racism and xenophobia kept out new people and influences, New Orleans took in waves of newcomers — Italians, Greeks, Germans and Irish — in the decades before World War I. Later arrivals came from Honduras, Cuba and Vietnam.” First off, they’re implying that racism and xenophobia are the only reasons for limiting immigration; they’re subtlely painting their opponents as racist xenophobes. Second, were these legal or illegal immigrants? If we are really so reliant on undocumented Mexican labor, we must wonder why those previous immigrants probably came in legally. Next, these immigrants were eventually assimilated into American culture. Illegal immigrants demonstrate a disrespect for our laws, and therefore, we have no reason to believe that they will assimilate into our society and protect our Constitution. The situations are completely different, but the LA Times is implying that they’re the same.

At least the LA Times could have a progressive bias instead of an illegal immigration bias. My irony meter went off when I came across this passage: “But beginning in the 1970s, the port downsized, businesses left town, wages fell, welfare rolls and crime rose as the public education system collapsed. A black underclass took low-skilled, low-wage jobs. Fewer immigrants moved to town.” [Emphasis mine.] Don’t you get it? Since all the black people left after their homes were destroyed, now we need Mexicans to do the dirty work. We’re replacing one underclass with another underclass.

If the LA Times was really liberal, they’d care about one underclass being replaced with another underclass. What’s the LA Times real agenda? Why are they trying to defend illegal immigration? Is it because they have illegal immigrants working for them, mowing their lawns and cleaning their houses? Alright, that’s not fair, that’s not fair on my part at all, but I wonder.

Let’s dig deeper. Next, the LA Times says, “The rest of the South, meanwhile, became what New Orleans had been: Atlanta, Memphis, Nashville and Charlotte saw tens of thousands of Mexicans arrive, taking jobs in hotels, restaurants, construction and landscaping. Mexicans slaughtered pigs in Guymon, Okla., and made carpeting in Dalton, Ga. Historians call their arrival the largest influx of foreign workers to the South since the days of slavery.”

When the passages I’ve quoted are looked at together, we see the LA Times’ story is based on a false logic. First, our country’s economy is reliant on undocumented labor, according to them. They imply that the New Orleans economy was bustling because of immigrant labor. They imply the South in general were bustling because of immigrant labor. However, they say the South’s “feeble economy” discouraged immigration. New Orleans’ down-sizing discourages immigration. So, was the economy reliant on immigration? Or was immigration reliant on the economy? Taken in context, how can they make the claim that our country is reliant on illegal aliens?

I’ll stop now. This article is ridiculous. Our country is in no way dependent on undocumented migrant labor. Pure bullshit.

Fool me once on immigration, shame on you… Fool me twice

“Fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again” — President Bush

In 1986, Congress granted amnesty to illegal immigrants who had already been in the country for some time, and Congress promised to clamp down on future illegal immigration. In 2006, Congress plans to put illegal aliens on a path to citizenship and increase border enforcement in order to clamp down on future immigration. Is anyone else getting an odd sense of deja vu?

Look, Congress, we already granted amnesty in 1986. You promised to stop illegal immigration after that. Instead, we have 12 million new illegal immigrants. You’re not going to fool the American public again. The time for amnesty is past. Do what you promised to do 20 years ago. Stop the illegal immigrants.

Economics Drives Slavery

“Look, slaves pick our cotton. Slaves work for free. Look, I’m not happy about slavery. But do you want to pay an extra dollar for your fabulous cotton T-shirt? I know I don’t. I know the American people are not going to pay an extra dollar for their cotton T-shirts in order to free the slaves. That’s economics. It’s not fair, but you can’t fight economic demand,” so said the economics professor.

Say, I gots an idea! Howzabout instead of putting illegal aliens on a path to citizenship, let’s create a permanent underclass of immigrant workers! After all, they’re only here to do the jobs we don’t want to do, right? We’ll create a class of people that can work below minimum wage just so we can get our strawberries cheap! That sounds fair and just to me! And if anyone says it’s not fair, well, you can’t fight economic demand. No matter what you do, they’ll come anyway. And we know that no American would ever take those jobs (forget the large percentage of workers that aren’t illegal). So, why not just make them a permanent underclass so we can get cheap houses and strawberries! Yay America!

This crazy fun time was partly inspired by this MSNBC article: Economics of immigration could defy laws. Honestly, if the businesses had their way, they’d be perfectly happy with a permanent underclass paid below minimum wage.

The problem after 1986 wasn’t exactly purely economics. The laws weren’t enforced, and they aren’t now being enforced. All the economic factors in the world wouldn’t let illegal immigrants through if we built a fence, instituted a draft, and patrolled our borders with soldiers. That’s a bit extreme, but it’s true. I wonder if we had enforced our laws in the first place, would we have as big a problem with illegal immigration?

The economic status quo is also malleable. We’re paying prices for gasoline that we would’ve found outrageous not too long ago. We also have to wonder about the true cost of things. Sure, I’m paying less for a fruit. Yet, my tax money might go to your child’s free lunch at school because you’re getting paid peanuts. Hm…

At least the article did have the gall to admit: “While illegal immigrants play a crucial role in the economy, their importance is sometimes overstated. Foreign workers account for less than 5 percent of the nation’s labor force. They are concentrated by industry and geography in ways that would cushion the larger economy should they removed from it. While their labor affects the prices consumers pay for some goods, it is but one component.”

Yet, the thesis of the article seems to be the all-powerful strength of economics in driving illegal immigration. Doesn’t that concession undermine the point that we can’t fight the “tremendous economic demand for illegal immigrants”?

Moreover, the article explains where the demand is coming from: “The reality, though, is that given the motivations of the businesses and workers at its center, regulating the flow of workers at the periphery of the economy will be very difficult, whether or not immigration is legal, experts say.” Although the article starts with the lovely tale of the employer who hires immigrants because he thinks his customers won’t pay extra, the real motivation to hire illegals comes from the motivation of businessmen to not have to pay as much for wages. We must realize that if it were up to businesses to decide everything, we probably wouldn’t have a minimum wage in the first place. I’m sure there are some people who agree with that we shouldn’t, but I bet the majority of Americans agree that there should be a minimum wage. So, why haven’t businesses gotten rid of the minimum wage by having their lobbyists scream about economic factors?

The moral of the story? Don’t accept the inevitability of economic factors. If we choose to clamp down on illegal immigration, it can be done, economic factors be damned. If we punish businesses for hiring illegals, then let’s see what happens to that omnipotent economic demand.