I’m such a tease. I said I was going to show out and out bias, but it’s really not so bad as that. Let’s look at these two paragraphs together.

Paragraph one: “The rallies are coming at a time when Congress — and indeed, the nation — seems torn about what to do about the burgeoning numbers of immigrants who are coming into the country every year.” Alright, so the nation is torn about what to do about these illegal immigrants who storm into our country and then demand things.

Paragraph two: “A poll released today by The Washington Post and ABC television showed that 75 percent of Americans believe United States authorities are not doing enough to stop illegal immigration.”

So let’s see, 75% agree that we’re not doing enough to stop illegal immigration. 75% of the people want something done! Even though 3/4s of the people agree, the New York Times says that the nation is torn. To me, it seems pretty fucking obvious what the American people want: Enforce our laws and secure our borders.

Message to Congress: You shouldn’t be torn. 75% of the people! Hello!

What’s up with all this obfuscation?

Coming up tomorrow: Beautiful, beautiful satire.