I have come to the realization that I am very short. This is a problem. Not that I’m insecure or anything, but people look up to their leaders, so to speak. Basically, if I want to be a politician and president, I’ll be facing an uphill battle as a short person. I don’t have as commanding a presence as those who are taller. Those as tall as, let’s say, John Kerry, have a natural advantage in elections. The taller person tends to win.

This disappoints me. I do have a plan, though. I am half-Asian. (That’s why I’m so short.) More specifically, half-Chinese. Perhaps, I should help agitate for democratic change in China. If they ever do have democratic elections, I can move there. Maybe I can be president of China. I don’t think I’ll have to be as tall.

Just kidding. I love my country. I figure if FDR could figure out how to deal with being disabled, I can figure out how to deal with being short.