I’ve been sometimes referring to a “summer class” I took this, well, summer. Really, I should be referring to it as engineering camp. I mean, that’s what it was, basically. The program itself was more, but the class I chose… engineering camp.

That clarified, what did I do in engineering camp? (Besides participating in the duct taping of someone to the wall, that is.) The full inglorious story is something I could not tell well without boring you, and boring myself — something more suited for list form. However, I don’t want to write a list today. Thus, I’m sectioning off this story, writing one little tale about engineering camp.

To make us easier to manage, they split us up into groups, headed by a TA, or “team adviser,” who was sometimes accompanied by an “ATA.” It helped keep track of us during field trips, off-campus, or even just walking across campus.

There was also one more purpose of the group. Each team’s goal was to build something that stayed in the air for about 12 seconds, the same time as the Wright brother’s first famous flight. Suffice it to say, however, our flight did not need to be sustained or controlled. Just 12 seconds. Our materials were severely limited, and the “flier” had to hold a little army guy. Luckily, the army guy couldn’t have weighed more than two pennies, or even more than one.

The simplest solution was the one my group picked: a parachute. We used a bag, cut it into a rectangle, tied string to the four corners, tied the string to the army man, weighted the army man with some pennies, and we were done.

Well, except for the matter of testing. Our parachute was successful. Too successful, in fact. The wind caught it, and it got stuck on the roof. Efforts to free the army man were wildly unsuccessful, and mildly entertaining, at least to me. I didn’t help get it down; I just sat back and laughed at the vain efforts.

Later, it was remarked that this was “true” engineering. All of us coming together and trying to solve this problem.

Yeah… Throwing a rubber ball covered in duct tape that someone found in the janitor’s closet is engineering? Linking together junk in the dumpster to form something that obviously would never come close to reaching the necessary five stories is engineering? Completely ignoring one girl’s suggestions is all of us coming together?

Call me a cynic, but while you’re at it, you’ll also have to call me right.

We get back, and so, with ignoring of this one person, everyone else suddenly realizes that 15 people in a group is unwieldy for building a simple parachute. I don’t want to brag, but I knew this wasn’t a 15-person job a long time ago.

I come up with the suggestion of splitting up into two committees. One to work on the actual parachute, one to work on the poster. (Another requirement was a presentation of the flier, including a poster.) Someone else suggests a third committee: a string committee. Yes, a five-person committee for the strings connecting the parachute to the army guy. A five-person committee. Four pieces of string.

Whatever. I argued against it, but I didn’t really do any work on the parachute, anyway, and I was outnumbered. I joined the poster committee. If you know me, then you might know that I am no artist, at least, in terms of drawing. Why did I join poster committee? Two reaons. One, I hadn’t done much work on the parachute in the first place. Two, I’ll be frank, it was to avoid work.

Avoiding work wasn’t all selfish. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do anything in the other two committees. Even split up, the job just was unwieldy for 15 people. At least with poster, I could try to do something, right? Meh, ends up, I didn’t do any work on the poster, anyway.

to be continued…